What a year this has been. In looking back over the past 11 months I realize a lot has taken place this year. I also realize that because I don’t work your normal 9 to 5 job, I don’t have some of the experiences that I used to.
One of those being evaluations. When I was working, these usually came in the spring, right after tax season. (For more on that see Taxes, China, and A Life Change) But this would be the time where we would set new goals and would be evaluated on our performance for the past year. Thankfully I had one of those bosses who took this time to give us constructive evaluations and give suggestions on what we could do to improve in the areas that needed improving. He didn’t harp on our failures, mistakes, or other mess-ups. And now, the funny thing is, I find that I am missing that. Because I no longer have that, I am having to self evaluate, and quite frankly I am a harsher critic of myself than anyone else ever has been.
So now here I am, about to embark on a self evaluation. But the one thing that I will strive to do this time, is instead of seeing myself as the world sees me, I will try to see myself as God see’s me. No, I’m not perfect, and I know that God doesn’t see me as perfect. He see’s all of my flaws, sins, and mess ups, but He also see’s me as His creation, His daughter. Someone He has given a specific talent and calling to. Someone He has made righteous, who is to shine His love to the world. And I am asking Him to reveal to my heart what areas of my life He wants me to correct, what areas I need to work on.
As I was writing this, I stopped for a few minutes, and one of the things I read was a twitter from @loswhit asking “Have you been in the word today? If not. Stop whatever you are doing, get in it.” I felt convicted, because I hadn’t, and so I did. And here is what God showed me -
Job 5 – 8 & 9, 18 – 27, ESV “8 As for me, I would seek God, and to God would I commit my cause, 9 who does great things and unsearchable, marvelous things without number:” “18 Behold, blessed is the one whom God reproves; therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty. For he wounds, but he binds up; he shatters, but his hands heal. 19 He will deliver you from six troubles; in seven no evil shall touch you. 20 In famine he will redeem you from death, and in war from the power of the sword. 21 You shall be hidden from the lash of the tongue, and shall not fear destruction when it comes. 22 At destruction and famine you shall laugh, and shall not fear the beasts of the earth. 23 For you shall be in league with the stones of the field, and the beasts of the field shall be at peace with you. 24 You shall know that your tent is at peace, and you shall inspect your fold and miss nothing. 25 You shall know also that your offspring shall be many, and your descendants as the grass of the earth. 26 You shall come to your grave in ripe old age, like a sheaf gathered up in its season. 27 Behold, this we have searched out; it is true. Hear, and know it for your good.”
